Orange county fair

I love county/state fairs more than many things in this world. I try to make it to the orange county fair multiple times a summer. I've even been to the Alaskan State fair (where I rode a mechanical salmon, by the way).

My favorite things about the fair are the knitting, quilting and crochet, the wood working, centennial farms... oh man, all of it.

This year was a little different with baby in tow. Lots of finding a good place to feed him. But I did get a chance to go through the textile exhibits twice and got all inspired. Next year I will submit a piece or two, just have to decide what!

Baby blanket

I have posted pictures of my king-sized "selfish blanket." I am about 50/80 done with that one. Along the way I decided to start making squares about a quarter of the size, and make a baby blanket.

My first son is due May 17th. We already had a ton of handmedowns and baby things I had made for Daisy, but I wanted to spend some time on something specifically for him.

It's made with sock yarn on size 3 dpn's. It's 6 x 6 squares. I crocheted 6 rows of hdc for the edging. I love the finished product and can't wait for my baby boy to use it.

Baby blanket

I will be 28 weeks pregnant with my son on Saturday!  Right now I am lying on the couch enjoying feeling him wiggle and kick. This is a picture of some of the squares for his blanket. It's a miniature version of the king sized blanket I am making for my own bed.

My Selfish Blanket

The events of my life could be described by what project I am working on. When something big happens, my first thought is, "what yarn goes with this?" When we go on a trip, when a friend gets pregnant, with every holiday, and with every bit of grief or sadness. 

When my daughter died last October, a week before her due date, one of the most strange things about my sadness was that my hands weren't busy. I had been making baby clothes, soakers and stuffed animals - and then when I got out of the hospital I put all that away and did not know what to do. I didn't want to start a new project, which would forever remind me of the excruciating pain I was in. I ended up working on a cross-stitch project that I had already been working on for about 2 years - a photo of my husband and I dancing at our wedding. It was time-consuming (a blessing when you are grieving), did not take much thought (also helpful), and the photo of my husband and I holding each other helped me remember to be grateful, even then.

It has been almost 9 months since then, and I have worked on a lot of other projects since. But despite the growing number of friends I have who are pregnant or have babies, I have not been able to bring myself to work on any baby-related item. Instead, I decided to start something entirely for me. I've been calling it My Selfish Blanket, and it has helped me remember that I need to take care of myself, too.

It's a knitted blanket, made with sock yarn, on size 3 double pointed needles. So far I've been averaging about a square per week. I currently have 13 squares done, and 1 on the needles. I figure I'll need about 80 squares to have a good-sized blanket. 

The way the rest of the knitting world knows this blanket is by the name Barn Raising Quilt - the idea is that a lot of people each knit one square, and contribute. There is something resentful and rebellious in me that rises up and thinks I Can Do This On My Own - that I don't want anyone else to touch this, all those people who get their babies and their families and don't know what it's like.

 That feeling ebbs and flows - and another takes its place. There's something about the insanity of this project - the fact that I am making a queen-sized blanket on sock yarn and size 3 needles, the fact that it will take me at least a year to complete, the vastness of this project that reminds me of the work that goes into living a grieving life. That there is this huge, seemingly insurmountable chore in front of you, and all you can do is take another breath, knit another stitch, keep going because that's where the work is, that's what you have to do.

atwater village vest

Yesterday, an unschooling mom who lives surprisingly and delightfully close to me, took me on a tour of the neighborhood. We went to coffee shops, toy stores, parks, and more. I got a bunch of practical how-to-park-here advice, and a humongous list of places I want to explore further. This awesome neighborhood tour will get more detailed blog posts in the future... but first...

One of the stops we made was at The Little Knittery in Atwater Village, where I spent an agonizingly long time choosing a skein of yarn to buy. I ended up with this - Noro taiyo silk/wool blend. It's a frustrating yarn - catches on my fingers, it's super tightly spun so it knots up, and it fuzzes together with the other pieces easily. However, once I've knit up a few rows, it's really, really pretty and falls really well.

I've never successful knit a garment for myself to wear larger than a pair of socks. I've decided it's time to change that. Find an easy pattern and copy it? That is not the Roya way. Instead, I am making up my own pattern. Let's see if I am the knitter I think I am.

I'm using this blog entry as a way to update the pattern --

Cast on 500 stitches (to figure it out for your size: figure out the widest you want it to be at the bottom [for me, 53 inches wide] knit up a gauge swatch [for me, 25 sts in 3 inches. That turns into 475 stitches, but then I decided I wanted peaked edges, so I added 25 more stitches, and I'll decrease later on]

I forgot to do stockinette stitch, and knit the first 3 rows. Then I remembered, and began purling on the wrong sides, knitting on the right side.

Continue stockinette stitch for the length you want from bottom hem to under armpits.
I decreased to 475 stitches by knitting 2 together on either ends every 10 rows (ish).

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I'm only about an inch into the stockinette right now, haven't even done my first decrease. I'll check back in with edits, and the next steps when I get there!